DIY Chunky Clay Rings + Some (deeper) Thoughts

Doing a year of Zoom University can really drain a person, so maybe I can blame my inactivity for that reason. The last time I posted was a year ago, maybe???

The other day, I was thinking about how summers tend to feel so far away from each other. In high school, there was a distinguishable difference (my English professors are probably quaking from that odd syntax) - I mean obvious shift - between the years. For example, oh - that year I went to a Missions Trip and that year my sister got married. But in 2021, the 2020 summer seems like it was "just yesterday," although so much has changed. How have you grown over the past year? 

Freshman year + the first two months of summer have been c h a o t i c. Ft. me rewinding by making these rings, although you don't see how frustrated I am with how long it takes to make those squiggly lines. 

A formless block of clay can become a beautiful adornment, statement, or representation of art once it is shaped. Before the start of college, my future was formless and unappealing. What shape is my life even holding? I asked. It all seemed mundane and pointless. Just a blob. 

"But now, O Lord, you are our Father; we are the clay, and you are our potter; we are all the work of your hand." Isaiah 64:8

After spending a couple of hours using clay, this verse makes a bit more sense to me. The process of molding clay never looks pretty or complete until it is (at the end). Many times I had to scrap something and re-do it. If there was a crack, I had to mend it together. But that's the nature of clay. You can't make a "mistake" with this medium, whereas you cannot un-paint something on canvas. God can use any part of our lives. If there's a crack or pivot, He can put it back together. If the whole thing has gone awry, He can remold it and start from the beginning. I've made mistakes and have felt huge cracks in my heart. But at the work of His hand over time, my life has been molded over and over again. It's transformed.

I just want to say to myself, I am proud of you. That is a dangerous sentence, because I can easily cut it off so that it says "I am proud." But that's not what I am saying. 

I am proud of how you wrote essay after essay and fought to learn. I am proud of your leadership skills, which you never fully believed you had. I am proud of how you managed this first year though it was so lonely, miserable, and isolating. I am proud that you found yourself again. 

I am proud of you, I am not ashamed of you.

-Rebekah (til next summer? lol)